*Illuminating*

Tears rolling down your cold cheeks

I tried to reach you

But i can’t

The waves of love u sent to me

You always sent the right frequencies,

i knew that

u always did

That’s what made you unique and

That’s what touched me everytime

You did that

Though u’re gone

I can still feel you all around me

Trying to touch my fingertips

Embrace me when i am asleep

Kiss me on my forehead when i am off to school

Tell jokes when i’m miserable and down

Make fun of me when i’m being silly

Be with me whole day long instead of giving me presents on Valentine’s Day..

Play games with me when i need to relax

Play my favourite music instead of yours whenever u drive

Scold me when i do something wrong

Shop with me when there are sales

Understand what i really need

Love me no matter what i do or say

That’s what i miss u the most

I stands for the interviewer...
and P stands for the person being interviewed....

Let us check at the time now...it's 0035 a.m. *wink* 

ok...let's get it started,shall we? oh yeah,i'd forgotten to tell u people...
i am talking bout' an actual ielts speaking test...which kinda freaks me out...especially the second part...

In this afternoon,i was practicing with my dorm-mate/coursemate along the way we going back to hostel. We were joking of using Manglish in our ielts test.Things like Hokkien and Malay all appear in our conversation. And finally i was laughing my ass off and people on the road might see me as physcho,i guess. Hehe.Anyway,i told her what to tell the interviewer when he or she asks some "stupid" questions which she hopes to avoid (I really wish we can do that in our real test,wakaka) 

I: Good afternoon,my name is XXX,and i am going to ask u a few questions...can u pls tell me ur full name?

P: My full name is blah blah blah and u can call me blah...

I: Let's talk bout' what do u do? Are u a student or working?

P: I am a student.I am studying A-level currently and i am taking Bio,Chem and Math. 

I: Which subject do u think is the most difficult? 

P: Bio lo. because there is a lot of facts and terms we need to memorise ar.Hate lo! I dun like bio actually.I was forced by my grandma to take tis subject because my grandma was once a Biology competition champion in her skul long long time ago.

I: Well,let's talk bout' ur hometown..

P: Well,my hometown is in XXX which is situated in the Northern Malaysia.It's a district of Penang but it is located on the mainland instead of on the island. It's a beautiful,wonderful and peaceful place to live.People here are omg,very friendly and helpful. 

I: What would u like to study in the future?

P: Erm...ar....erm...ar....medicine gua. Because i can save other people's lives and find cures for diseases which i think really cool le! 

.............
Tips: If the interviewer asks a difficult question,u can just reply him or her," What a stupid question is that! I am not that stupid and i won't answer that question! " and oh ya,our people pronounce the coarse words even better than the foreigners....u know,the F words and WTH and WTF....things like that... They even become experts in using these words and u can actually "see" it everywhere.On the signboards,on the innocent walls of the public toilet ( i dunno whether we conteng  toilets in our own home),on the painted walls of the lift.....haiz...whatever...suit themselves!

I'd been away from my blog for several months d i suppose. Sry guys,for those who keep checking on my blog. I had my biology trial today. I was not well-prepared at all cos' i din study at all.I just went through some of the core syllabus and tried to look at the pass year questions which my frens assure me that the lecturer will test us on those. I tried not to follow a trend like that but finally i gave up on my idea of revising all chapters and I straight away set my sight onto those past year papers. I tried not to memorise the answers and answered most of questions using logical thinking and facts in my memory. The only questions that really freak me out are the questions on biodiversity and  applications cos i din study at all. This could be the worst exam ever for me. Now chem is another tedious test for me as i kept revising bio for the past few days and i din get my hands on chem at all. So i am sure that i'll die in this test d. 

Okla...it's pretty late right now and i have to finish my speech for tomorrow ielts's speaking practice.Ciao!

Twilight
New Moon
Eclipse (still out of stock in most of the bookstores in the northern region of Malaysia,cool huh?)
Breaking Dawn

Ladies and Gentlemen,
Boys and Girls,
This is Twilight Saga...haha

Well...
*clearing throat*

These are the books that I recently spend most of the precious time on
And these are the stories or more accurately,a story  that is so alluring and filled with suspense and mysteries which is simply irresistable

For girls,
For most of the girls,including myself for sure,
We indulge in this story 
Not just because of the character,
 
Well...u know what i mean
Since the movie is out,
We already have the real images of the character inside 

The Lion
Edward Cullen
And
The Lamb
Isabella Swan

Also,
We girls just love romantic stuffs 
It's our nature
Pls  excuse us for being like that
The love story that revolves around Edward and Bella is uncommon yet alluring
U read it
and u will understand what i'm trying to explain

Here's the excerpt of the first book of the series,Twilight

I’d never given much thought to how I would die — though I’d had reason enough in the last few months — but even if I had, I would not have imagined it like this.

This is totally insane! 

Though today is 14th of Septemer,i would always remember 13th of September,2008.

13th of September ,2008

My Sweeeeettt 18th Birthday!!!! ^^ 

Hell ya...it's just...CRAZY!

Well...sometimes even though u din receive any presents from them,
u still felt satisfied with their sweet and lovely greetings.

And OH YA!!!

I just found out that my eldest brother had bought me a doll...

Haha...



OMG

He said he forgot to bring back but he told me what it is

CAT ZAI in cantonese 

Haha i have told him so many times b4 that i wanted that doll so BADLY cos it's damn cute.

OKAY...

I am just getting excited..
and really gan dong.....

cos i haven't had such a sweet and unbelievable birthday.

PLUS:
It's my 18th birthday!!

What more could I ask for!!!

..........................................................................................
Okie,i'll start talking on events that had happened from 12th of September till today.

12/9/2008    3.45p.m

On that day,all of us smelled freedom. ^^ That's right,we just had had our exam and the last subject is Pure Mathematics,which is,well,that day my condition was not that well.I believed it was all b'cos I had spent a few precious hours on playing mobile games in that morning which had made me so gong gong and dizzy all day long and made stupid mistakes. Swt.It shouldn't have happened to me.I mean i should have understand that exam is really important to me and i must perform well in exams in order not to break the scholarship bond between me and disted. 
.......
Let's us put exam aside temporary,shall we?
[Clear throat]  

After the test,we (me,ck,cw,wc a.k.a s,jv,kc) all rushed to the Red Box in Gurney Plaza.That was my very first time to Red Box. OMG.What more could i say? The experience is invaluable! We all sang which means all the BOYS got involved in singing too. LOL. I think all of us were pitchy and we're all a BIT whacky.

Okie,a lot.. major... 

SO WHAT!

We were having so much fun that no one could stop us from having fun!


What surprised me so much was the time when wc and i get back to our room from restrooms.

They actually bought me a cake..well...half a cake...lol...but that's really enough d... ^^

PLus:
It's tiramisu from Secret Recipe!

OMG

I was so surprised and gan dong all of sudden!

They sang birthday songs to me and Sayang tried to play a trick on me. HAHA. BUt i knew.. She asked me to pull out the candle with my mouth. -.-'' While i did that,she tried to press my head onto the cake. Luckily i din kena ! PHew...haha anyway,i am really grateful to have this bunch of frens. Whenever i get along with them,i won't worry about anything cos they'll always make u laugh out loud! THKS GUYS!!!MUACKZ!!! ^^

..............................................................
Later on that day,CK drove me to Autocity together with CW...^^ When my parent came and fetch me,they suggest to have dinner in Fishmarket since we were in Autocity. My father let me order the main courses cos he said it was all for my birthday....Awww so sweet! Thks dad. ^^  I had a wonderful times and unforgettable experiences that day.

This is not the end of the story YET!



13/9/2008  12.01 a.m.
Merely one minute the day un-officially turned into my birthday,my cellphone never stopped beeping and vibrating. Messages and phone calls replaced my tiredness.Speechless.All my frens including my ex-classmates aka Best Frens and my coursemates,are just AMAZING.They actually remembered my birthday!
In fact i thought that many would forget that day was my birthday.But things turned out to be the best! I received messages and phone calls from frens and unexpected persons too .^^ Haha I could not say anything more but to thk them deep in my heart. I luv u guys so much!!!!! MUACK!!!

And on that day it was the first time that my cell phone memory full bcos of messages..LOL...unbelievable!

This year,my birthday is accompanied by another good new.

That is we were moving into a new home! 

Omg,our new home is just..............i speechless *can't find the right word to describe it since it is too amazing* Though we all busy packing things and tidying up our new home,my mum always remind herself that that day was my birthday. 


She even said," Aiya,today is ur birthday,i shouldn't ask u to do chores one"  A bit swt la,but gan dong too...LOL



But i was so bad la haha when my eldest bro came home i kept telling him to do chores.Do this and do that. cos he din help with the chores at all.Haha fair enough gua? :D Wahahaha....

...........................................

14/9/2008
Today is the day that we move into our new home! 
Cheers!

Unfortunately,i dun hav the chance to stay overnight at our new home on this very first day cos i have to get back to Penang.Suddenly i hate skul just because of this reason.Haha. My mum is a mum who has great potential to become a designer.Indeed she is good in designing since she designed most of the parts of our new home.Cheers for her!!!

Okie la i think that's all for today la.
I am exhausted now.
0.0 sleepy .....

C y'all!






 

Start All Over Again

Waking up 
And find myself in a mess
Starring blankly
At the leafty trees
Makes me even lost

Everytime I fall 
I'll try to fight back
And hold back my tears
I am so afraid to show them
The pieces of my broken heart
My dreams
I wish them understand
But they won't




[Chorus]
I gotta go after my dreams
I gotta paint my life 
With rainbow smiles and joy
Just hold on,
And i'm gonna make it through
Every mountains and seas
I just wanna be myself
And live my dreams
All i gotta do
Is to start all over again




Not even a tear 
Or a broken heart
Can bring me down
No one
can ever tell me 
My dream has been torn apart
Those cold words
Can never bring me down




It's not easy to
Block the way for darkness
But i'm gonna try 
And let the sun
To light up my way
A way to a better world




 

Lyrics writing,well,is something i'm really really into it. :)
(Not to mention the skill cos i am not a pro,but i kinda know how to turn it into a powerful expression tool)

I used to write lyrics everyday once i have ideas or inspirations from sights and sounds that surrounds us. I used to play guitar for a while (but i passed up on guitar after approximately two months) 
The true reason that i gave up on guitar is I dun really have the heart to learn something especially musical instruments at my age.I have the heart to write music,but no creating music.U get what i mean? I love to write what i feel and what kind of music that suits those words,and that's all. Maybe i am already a guitar pro no matter on Guitar Hero or in the real life if i was given a chance to learn all these when i was still an innocent child who loved to play mamasak and transformer. ^^


I remember when i told some of my close buddies in college that i am SERIOUSLY influenced by my bros,they all like looking at me with their mouth stuck at "o" shape. HAha. Why would i say so? I think u better check on the list below. (wink)


1.I seldom play barbie doll. Trust me,even I got a chance on barbie dolls,I would tear off all its parts.Hoho.I am the next Emi the Barbie-Doll Ripper.Mark it. Maybe ur next barbie doll might be the next victim.Hehe.

2.Well,i play games.Girls like to play maple story and all sorts of girlish,stylish games,whether it be mini ones or complicated ones. For me,CS and Starcraft are my all-time favourite. Oh ya,i miss out Red Alert. ^^  I fall for strategy games and no one can stop me from playing them once i got a hand on them.

3.I listen to rock music. (Or according to Je Vin,those music are hard metals ) Scorpions is one of the rock band whose music i had been listened to since i was young.Well this time i was influenced by my father.I enjoyed all those music then and now.

Oh!
I like black and white!
....................................

U know,i am kinda lazy to list out all of them....


Actually,before i start writing this article,i have already got an idea in my mind. 

Truly speaking,my lyrics are cartoon-ish and theoretically lots of grammatical mistakes.
U'll know! 



I Wanna Be The Brightest Star

Everything is getting better 
When I stop stalking the shadow of the past
And realise 
I've to find a way through the thorny pathway

My world seems to be torn apart 
When I want to give in everything to my past
And then i realise
I gotta choose who i really want to be

Time is creeping by
Mercilessly
And sometimes 
i just wanna scream to the people
Though i am not that smart
Trust me
I am getting

[CHORUS]
All these choices are up to me
and i am going to reach out 
For a higher level
No more hiding,no more running
Just one more step
and i can become a star
Shining on the people that i love
And I wanna be
The brightest star


No pushing
No rushing 
I am going to work it out
I am not afraid 
Of the faked smiles and twisted truths
I am going 
To dig out the hidden dream
And i am going to work on it

General Paper finally comes to me.
It stabs at my back without knowing that it is stalking at me.
Creepy fellow...it never shows itself until it finds the most impecable time to give u a drop-dead shocking push!
I am stunned by the superpower it possess.
It could shoot down anyone who fail to fuilfil its request anytime.
I am the first one...
Haha
Retarded,
U might have say...
I always fail to think of some useful points that i could use in my essay..
GP which is the one that has twisted my identity.
I am now no more ditching books,and i am a BOOK-LOVER now.
I read few story books in such a "big" number for me as in my past 17 years,it have been wasted.
I am not proud but i am gleeful that i have made it.
I now realise that i totally have the potential to be a BOOK-WORM
haha.
Watever!
I should have taken "good" care of my general paper.
I must learn to fall in love with it...as it play a prominent part in my future life and career! ^^

Oh,I am really screwed.Who could just come over and pull my nose away from the book???? 
I almost stick my nose to the story book,SHopaholic Takes Mahathan all day long.
I try to distract my attention by flipping through the biology reference book,making an attempt to read something that is really "useful" for my studies especially the bioloy subject is getting harder and harder.It is quite different a bit..it starts to put us all into a small bus,whizzing off to the fast lane.Once we fail to catch up or really have to give up,we would probably be pushed out of bus and die on the spot! That's cruel but it's reality! This whole world is so competitive,even in such a small society,you could feel the intense atmosphere all the time,almost at everywhere.I haven't finished reading the book yet,and i still got five books,i guess,are in queue.I know i shouldn't read all them right now,but i think they might be useful in my gp.U know,my english sux.If i am not going to improve now,when should i? And what could i if i fail my gp??? I would break down cos i think i would have failed myself in everything.I am loser and quiter if i give up at this moment.So,i have decided to put more efforts on my gp than other things.I must get an A for my gp cos it determine my future......Haha..i am not quite certain what would i be in the future..Who knows??? Maybe i would be the next prime minister of the country...wakaka..i know i know it's exaggarating! Anyway,realy,trust urself,and this would makes ur tomorrow a better day to live!!! Cheer!!!

Wow,i can't believe myself.Haha.I have read through three books in a week.Wakaka.Well,FYI i was not usually doing this in my past.I would definately get bored and sleepy easily if u gave me a stack of books (to me at that time was a pile of shits..haha no hard feeling to those book-lovers).However,i believe i really have undergone revolution---from a book-hater to BOOK-LOVER! Woohoo! I can't believe myself,for real,when i am writing this,i was actually just finished reading my third books this week entitled,"The Woman IN White".I have some wrong conceptions on the story of this book.I thought it was a ghost story,but in the end,i was ALL WRONG. (Well..who would not ever think of GHOST STORY when first saw this title printed on the cover of the book???) It is a detective and mystery novel actually.This book makes compelling reading and the mystery of the story intrigued me to kepp on reading.Now i am going on to read Shopaholic Takes Mahathan.
Haha.I am on mission.I believe if i keep on my hardwork,i would porbably accomplish my mission at the end of this year.Trust me! 

*Wink*
The previous entry is supposed to be posted in my blog yesterday.However i have to postpone due to absence of wireless connection my house.So dun get confused wo,this entry is today's one...the real one.

Today I finished reading a book entitled,Anne Frank: The Diary of A Young Girl.It was a nice book indeed.As most of it covered the content of Anne’s Frank diary(which talks about her life during the invasion of German in Holland),her diary showed detailed description of life of her family and herself during the two years of hiding in their secret shelter which she named it as The Secret Annexe. Her whole family were Jews. When Holand was invaded by German,they were terrified and began to plan for their hiding plans.

Well..what I really learnt from this wonderful girl is HOPE. She was brave and cheerful.She was a sparkling star in the family and she found her first love in that period of hiding.Although she was young (she was 12-14 years old when she wrote her diary),she was ambitious and her mind was filled  with hopes and dreams.She loved to write and she wanted to be a journalist.She wanted to be different from other women in the region as she thought all other women were simply did their jobs and were then forgotten.She didn’t want to be forgotten.She wanted to be useful,and to bring enjoyment to all people,even those that she hadn’t met before.She wanted to go on living after her death.

I love this part of her.I love she was courageous to speak out her feelings to her family and her newly-made friends.She knew how to express her feelings to her BF too..Haha…which was a very wonderful and special event to her.She was full of ideas and witty.Unfortunately,the Germans would not let go any Jews once they all were apprehended and imprisoned.Likewise.the Franks family  unsuccessfully escaped  from the stretching devilish hands of German armies even though they were hiding in a so-called safe zone.The whole family was arrested and taken to different concentration camps.Some were taken to Auschwitz and Neuen Gamme concentration camps.However,most of them were not dead because of the gas,but of the extreme hunger and terrible illnesses. Anne Frank died because she was infected by a terrible illness and she died just before the British army arrived at the camp.The only survivor in Frank Family was her father.What a miracle! After the war,her father wanted the world to know about the diary as her diary talked on the awful suffering that had been experienced by Jews in the war.That’s  all then for  my review on this book.SNAP.Back to my life

Home sweet home.Hehe. I love my hometown,Nibong Tebal so much that I can’t wait to go back every weekends.Since I start studying in disted,I have to stay in the hostel which is 50km++ from my home.I miss my bed,my family and (OH YA!) a strayed dog outside my house.LOL.It was cute last time I saw it (well..b4 I left my hometown due to study in a college in Penang)…My mum would give it remaining food and it has a cossy living environment.Hehe.It slept under our cars which had protected it from unbearable heat during day and frigid temperature at night.What a nice trench coat for it! Wakaka.. However,my whole family started to hate it because it was crazy enough to bite down all the linings on our car and luckily only saga was the only victim in its disastrous attack..Ford and Honda survived this “supernatural” disaster!My livid parent would not give it any food and hit it whenever it came close to them.Haha. Bad dog.My mum always complaint she was doing all those good deed in vain.My whole family once expected it would look after our new home in few months later. Well..i think now the dog has to look for another “good” master la. I am quite reluctant to leave it honestly.It accompanied me for a few months already and I witnessed its growing process.I had fed it “weird” food (to him la) namely chocolate (I dun think dogs know how to eat this kind of damn hard food),oreo (haha…black and white..for it is a no no),slices of bread (it rejected them immediately) and some Indian cookies (which was my personal childhood favourite snack).BAD DOG indeed.

I finally finished reading my very first book,The World's Greatest Serial Killer.Non-fictional.I did try to finish reading few fictional books before. However,i was just a beginner and i often ended up ditching the books.My parents always scolded me for "collecting" those expensive books especially those were imported from western countries one.Real expensive.One 100+ pages book will cost me for 19 ringgit something.Wow,i ponder what kind of tree made up all the pages in the book???  And this time remember i use my own money to buy all these books and i have been being so "guai" cos i've borrowed some books from the library.Haha.I am so into those fictional and non-fictional books recently.I have started to read another one right now,entitled "The Woman in White"-tells a ghost story.My fren told me it kinda crept him out last time he read.Really? Dun try to bluff me! Wakaka..i am not that timid ok? 

Look at me,i was looking at the serial killer's stories..trust me,they were far more cruel and brutal than u could imagine.Besides,few people could hardly accept their killing measures.For an example,Jack the Ripper (the killer was never caught) hated prostitutes and he was believed of carrying a surgical kit with him whenever he was on his way to slaughter a prostitute.Witnesses alleged that he was well-dressed and no one would believe that he was the most-wanted killer.After he murdered a prostitute by stabbing her countless times,he would mutilate her body by opened up her stomach,pulling out all the intestines and put them over her right shoulder.Then he would cut off her flesh and flipped it over her left shoulder.Gross! Terrible! Horrible! Vegetable! LOL. Another case is the killer ( i am weak in memorising names one) like corpes and he would like to keep them all after he killed his victims.He would undresse,cleanse and dresse the corpes.He would slept with them too.Who's the son of the bitch? That's disgusting indeed. There is another one...a man liked women who wore heels.He would kidnap and strangle them to death.Then he would rape the corpes.OWH!  Gross! He would hang the corpe and play dressing-up using the corpes.He also chopped off legs of the bodies as MEMENTOES. Sigh.Actually we can't put all blames on these killers.Those killers would become that inhuman was most probably caused by their troubled family background. Some of them have junkies parent or sadist grandparents in their homes.Well...they would become like that was because of their environment actually.Most of their parents din care about their well-beings and that had caused growing vengeance in them. 
Ok...that's all my review for that book. Back to my life.

Well...i am quite pening today because of the newly-produced timetable. At first i din know i won't take a2 practical,instead i will take as practical again.Sigh.I thought i would take both of them.Never mind.Repeating as practical would be lots of fun for me because i could take this chance to show off in front of the freshies together with ah pek.Wakaka!!!! Jking.I take this course very seriously! Really! Haha.However,i am quite sad to be separated with my frens like 03 cos we are always put into different classes one.03,change surname la! Haha...until death will tear us apart! Wah..so exaggarrant! Haha..although we just know each other for three months only,she is already my best fren. She taught me lots of tricks on teasing ppl...haha...that's why i become that rude sometimes...wakaka..it's all 03's fault! Jking!