Almost dead.

This had been going on for months. It's been so long. It feels so torturous. I'm sick and tired. I'm tired of not knowing what I mean to you. I'm tired of feeling so one-sided all the time. I feel like a cushion. Always readily available for you and so dispensable.
Time and again, I've given up hope. But you revived it the very next day.
I'm too drained to continue this. Too drained.
I'm exhausted of waiting. Frustrated of waiting for your replies.
Everyday I repeat the same cycle. I'll be waiting, waiting for a miracle to happen. But it never happens.
Shattered.
I want to cry so badly, but no tears are flowing down. How pathetic.
The number of times whereby I've spoken up for you is now countless. I ignored all the nasty comments and opinions people said, because I chose to believe in you. Silly as I may seem, because I still do.
Tell me what I should do now.
Love,
Shu Hui

Sealed (Feb 5)