I Still Believe

What does it mean... To be mature?

What is... Maturity?

Why do we need to be... Mature?

Does growth=... Maturity?

------------

Enough. I want to call the shots!

What does it mean... To make a stand?

To make a stand... Against all odds?

To make a stand... Regardless of the result?

To make a stand... Regardless of the price you have to pay?

To make a stand... Regardless of all the rules you have to break?

To make a stand... Regardless of the consequences?

To make a stand... Against your integrity?

To make a stand... Against your conscience?

To make a stand... Against your parents?

To make a stand... Against Jesus?

To make a stand... Against the Word?

To make a stand... Against God?

What does it mean... To be strong?

What does it mean... To make a stand?

What does it mean... To be a conqueror?

A Kitler is a cat that bears a strong resemblance to Adolf Hitler. First discovered by Jameth. They wish to kill all the Mews.

They look an awful lot like Mr Hitler!!! x)

[[www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com]]

"Have A Little Faith In Me"

When the road gets dark
And you can no longer see
Let my love throw a spark
Have a little faith in me

And when the tears you cry
Are all you can believe
Just give these loving arms a try baby and
Have a little faith, faith in me

Have a little faith in me
Have a little faith in me, oh and
Have a little faith in me
Have a little faith, faith in me

When your secret heart
Cannot speak so easily
Come here baby, from a whisper start
To have a little faith in me

And when your back's against the wall
Just turn around and you, you will see
I will catch your, I will catch your fall just
Have a little faith, faith in me

Have a little faith in me
Have a little faith in me
Have a little faith in me
Have a little faith, faith in me

I've been loving you for such a long, long time
Expecting nothing in return
Just for you to have a little faith in me
You see time, time is our friend
Cos for us there is no end
All you gotta do is have a little faith in me

I will hold you up, I will hold you up and
Your love gives me strength enough to
Have a little faith in me
Oh faith, darlin'

Have a little faith in me
Oh, faith

不说，不代表无知，不代表不知道。

理由1：讨厌你的眼睛，看久了就会傻呵呵的笑或是很花痴的流口水，很影响我的淑女形像，讨厌！

理由2：讨厌你的嘴巴，上嘴唇的曲线长得比超级大美女的还好，讨厌！

理由3：讨厌你的气质，做什么事情都这么帅气~ 讨厌

理由4：讨厌你的品位，自以为长得帅就乱穿衣服，为什么什么衣服穿在你身上就那么好，讨厌！

理由5：讨厌你说话表情多，像个十几岁的小孩，让人忍不住前上前捏两把，多动症，讨厌！

理由6：讨厌你老少通吃，从80岁到8岁，人人都喜欢，天生万人迷，讨厌！

理由7：讨厌你的笑，18岁的人了，笑起来就像个可爱的小孩，讨厌！

理由8：讨厌你唱歌太投入，很多时候听得我差点流泪，讨厌！

理由9：讨厌你对fans的态度，对每个mm都那么好，知不知道这样更伤人心啊，讨厌！

理由10：讨厌你的脾气，有的无聊的人说你坏话，你还笑着对fans说没事，神啊，这是什么人啊，讨厌！

理由11：讨厌你的拼劲，每次上台表演都是满头大汗~！害我们又心痛又气忿，不懂照顾自己，讨厌！

理由12：讨厌你的毅力，一次不满意还要第二次~彩排总是一遍又一遍~尽管你已经背的滚瓜烂熟搞得我连打电玩都染上了你这种精神，差点没让人扁，讨厌！

理由13：讨厌你占用我的空间，房间墙上都是你的海报, i pod 里总有你的很多空间，讨厌！

理由14：讨厌你占用我的时间，有事没事就想你，看着海报发呆发半天，浪费了我的时间，讨厌！

理由15：讨厌你改变我的一些小习惯，手机字体变繁体........讨厌！

理由16：讨厌你让我嫁不出去，害得好多人都说我有问题，一拿身边的男生和你比，加起来都比不上你一根头发，一见王子误终身，讨厌！

理由17：讨厌你让我破费，一定去买正版唱片和VCD，一定要买看到的所有海报和照片、纪念品，讨厌……

理由18：讨厌你一直上棒棒堂，害我晚上不是失眠就是梦到你

理由20：讨厌你任何地方...害我那么迷恋你..

People who grow up in the East and West are really different.

To be understanding = To know and be tolerant or sympathetic toward (American Heritage Dictionary)

I find this meaningful, and keep reading it everyday. The value of wisdom, and understanding.

The Value of Wisdom (Proverbs 2)

My son, if you receive my words,
And treasure my commands within you,
So that you incline your ear to wisdom,
And apply your heart to understanding;
Yes, if you cry out for discernment,
And lift up your voice for understanding,
If you seek her as silver,
And search for her as for hidden treasures;
Then you will understand the fear of the LORD,
And find the knowledge of God.
For the LORD gives wisdom;
From His mouth come knowledge and understanding;
He stores up sound wisdom for the upright;
He isa shield to those who walk uprightly;
He guards the paths of justice,
And preserves the way of His saints.
Then you will understand righteousness and justice,
Equity and every good path.
When wisdom enters your heart,
And knowledge is pleasant to your soul,
Discretion will preserve you;
Understanding will keep you,
To deliver you from the way of evil,
From the man who speaks perverse things,
From those who leave the paths of uprightness
To walk in the ways of darkness;
Who rejoice in doing evil,
And delight in the perversity of the wicked;
Whose ways are crooked,
And who are devious in their paths;
To deliver you from the immoral woman,
From the seductress who flatters with her words,
Who forsakes the companion of her youth,
And forgets the covenant of her God.
For her house leads down to death,
And her paths to the dead;
None who go to her return,
Nor do they regain the paths of life—
So you may walk in the way of goodness,
And keep to the paths of righteousness.
For the upright will dwell in the land,
And the blameless will remain in it;
But the wicked will be cut off from the earth,
And the unfaithful will be uprooted from it.

最近说的话简直少得可怜。身边的人问我为什么，发生了什么事，我也不想说。

只能说你真的真的让我很失望。

但是，对不起。为我那不知名的错，我道歉。

过累了成日与世界对抗的日子。突然觉得一个人也可以过得很好，可以在小至微不足道的事情上得到幸福。

受了父母的气，还要面对朋友的指责。

觉得自己好冤枉。宁愿自己找个地方躲起来，与世隔绝也不错，就是不想让已经伤痕累累的心再受到伤害。

虽然不觉得自己好得到哪里，但至少我觉得人与人之间的相处要建立在：

真心，信任，相信，体贴，体谅，容忍，包容，等与基础的尊敬。

从几何时这些开始变成了一种奢望？

Hehheh. My new interest: 诗经. I'm going to make sure I finish 四书五经 after A levels. Ha. It's the goal that Mummy never allows me to reach. Thinks it's outdated. Yeah right. I'm gonna prove it Mama, you just wait. ;)

诗经：桃之夭夭 (施礼)

桃之夭夭，
灼灼其华。
姑娘出嫁，
欢欢喜喜成了家。

桃之夭夭，
蒉蒉其实。
姑娘出嫁，
欢欢喜喜成一家。

桃之夭夭，
蓁蓁其叶。
姑娘出嫁，
欢欢喜喜一家人。

Falling sick is never a good feeling. =(

BOO my sore throat aggravated. And I got a pounding headache. And a high fever. Body temperature averaging between 38.7-39.7 degrees Celsius, most of the time at 39.4. =\ Don’t like falling sick! Sigh. Spending half my day in bed. Precious time wasted. Stupid fever.

Tata people, take care of yourselves and don’t fall sick. Drink LOTS of water. :)

YAYE I got my purity ring today while shopping with Shueling. :)) Okay, I know it's the trend, the hots now and all. But I think it's pretty cool, as in, cool meaningful cool. Haha. Spread the right message right. CELIBACY BEFORE MARRIAGE xD

Prelims were officially over yesterday. WOWOWEE. 5 days of rest. Supposedly a study brake (break). But I won't be resting the entire time though. Will still study nevertheless. At my own pace. 2 chapters 2 subjects a day.

Went to MPCL after my last paper yesterday. This time's Chem MCQ was a breeze compared to all the previous times. Revision does help, of course. And thank you Charmaine Neo. Haha. ^^ Ladeeda.

So anyway I borrowed a thriller "Coldheart Canyon", a Chinese book, a book on philosophy "The Great Philosophers" and a book on medicine "The Merck Manual of Medical Information". The book on medicine's pretty interesting. Very in depth and intensive study on heart diseases, which I have a deep interest for. Of course, I'm hoping to learn more about physiotherapy too. Guess I'd still go the medical way. My way. Whatever I want it to be.

Going out even on these 5 days is difficult though. Daddy's still obsessed over the "Follow the Law" thing: 3 days notice in advance. BAA.

Poof goes my trip to the orphanage tomorrow. Oh well. I will still volunteer after As. No stopping me on that. You can stop me now, but not forever. Apathetic and selfish. Who's selfish, huh? You don't even know. And your interpretation is so warped. TSK.

You can control me now, but you can't control me forever. Just like I've discussed the matter with Shueling, Yuezhi and Janice, I'll do things that way if I have to. Of course, that way's just between me and them. But yeah, to prevent my parents controlling my life, that MIGHT be the ONLY way.

BAAA this is supposed to be a happy post. BABABABBABABA oh no I'm going to become a sheep soon. Oh wait, I'm born of the year of the horse, maybe I should learn how to NEIGHHHH.

Rarr before you get driven nuts by my ranting, which I myself am. Tata. ^^

The way to be happy is to...

See happy things;

See funny things;

Watch happy things;

Watch funny things;

Laugh at everything and nothing;

Be with happy people;

Be with funny people;

Read happy things;

Read funny things;

Think of happy thoughts;

Think of funny thoughts;

Think of people who love you and care for you;

And just be positive, ALWAYS. ;)




As they always say, you can't change the world, you can't change anyone else, but YOURSELF. ^^

Jiayou.

当我在自己的心旁建筑了重重的围墙，我把自己变成了局外人。

最近在考试，爸妈不允许我做任何东西，只能够看书，所以，我把可爱淘的书都拿了出来。现在，也只有它们能陪伴我度过这段时间了。

最近迷上了＜局外人＞。被韩雪理的悲惨所憾动了。

一直在反复思考着局外人的悲惨，也了解了世界上或许有许多种悲惨。而我，觉得自己似乎把自己变成了一切的局外人，透过＂玻璃窗＂看着窗外的世界。触不到，不入流，更不是窗外的世界的一部分。

可是，我不想这样啊！局外人是容易被人忽视的，更没有人在意他们的存在。

昨日夜晚突然间想到了李白的那首诗：

前不见古人，后不见来者。
念天地之悠悠，独怆然而泪下。

是啊。局外人是"前不见古人，后不见来者"的。或许他们的世界，少了感情。其实应该说是不感有任何付出，因为太害怕被伤害，太害怕所以宁愿站在玻璃窗的另一边。

孤单单地...

孤单单...

孤单单...

孤单单...





静静的羊肠路上满是你留下的回忆，

在这条路上，一只小青蛙曾经安慰悲伤的我。?

我垂下头，轻声哭泣中，

你又重新回到我身边，

那窒息的箱子，终于被彻底打碎。?

我熟睡时，你告诉我说你会带我走。

我们歌颂着爱情，我们呼唤着爱情，

永远不要忘记……

请用孤独的泪水记忆……

一个人的情歌…………

一个人的复仇………………

孤单单………………

孤单单………………

请追随着……追随着……

……我的死亡…………

Yoyoyoyo I'm back! Haha here are the photos...

WOAH the last day of August. =/ Haha jiayou jiayou people! Let's make history!!! x))

A nightmare. A super horrible dream. At least, to me.

Where I started losing the people around me--people I know, people I care for, people I'm close to. And I'm trying so hard to look for them, not even a glimpse of a familiar face, or the back of someone I know...

And then I'm lost. I'm alone. I'm frantically trying to find the way back. Looking at the unfamiliar surroundings, I try a direction that might lead to where I need to go, and I can't find it--the exit. I walk and walk and walk. Alone, afraid, lost. Then I started brisk walking and jogging and then running, and I still can't find where I need to go to.

Then, I see a place that looks familiar. A place that has appeared in my dreams before. But I choose not to run there, because that's not where I have to go. So I turned and ran back towards where I thought I came from, but the surroundings seem to be changing constantly, because they look unfamiliar again.

And then, I realized I was being followed. By two sinister characters. I didn't know them, but they knew me. And they kept taunting me from behind, kept attacking who I was and what I had, kept questioning my identity. But all I could think of was that I needed to get away. FAST.

But I couldn't run any faster than I already was. My bag was too heavy. I was being slowed down by the load I was carrying. My breathing gets difficult, but I still keep running. The two guys behind seem to find it an enjoyable thing to bully me with words, but who cares? The unfamiliar surroundings, the foreign looking neighbourhoods, the two bullies behind, I finally decided I couldn't just keep running. Although I'm not sure whether I'm running away FROM the bullies, or running TO where I know I have to, which I can't find.

I took out my handphone and dialled a number. And then... "Somehow I know I will find a way, to a brighter day, in the sun..." The alarm rang, and I woke up.

A symbolic dream. Something that probably describes how I'm feeling aptly.

Lost--Can't find my way, my direction, my dream.
Unsure--Don't know the way.
Alone--Closing up myself from everyone does make me feel like a lone ranger, which, I know, as Laimeng said, and as we learnt in Lesson 9 of GS, I'm not supposed to be... And as I withdraw myself from people, I feel like I'm losing them.
Afraid--Combine the three above.
Bullied--Yeah, I think I'm constantly being taunted by the devil.

Hmmm but I'm quite curious... Who did I call? xP

Today...

We were on our way home from tuition and Xiu Li mentioned ghosts. And I said Christians don't believe in them, and Yi Xian asked, "What about nearly-headless Nick?"

And so I started explaining Christianity to Yi Xian and Xiu Li. Talked about faith, about Christ, about salvation, about sin, about end of age, about Old and New Testaments, about Jews, about God's children, about gender, and about God.

What surprised me, was when Yi Xian told me that I was strong in my faith, and I was stunned. Then and there. Yes I was stunned.

You don't have a clue how much this stuns me, because I admit that not only have I withdrawn from people--Christians and non-Christians alike, I have not been very faithful to the daily habits and stuff.

In fact, I was worried that I'm gonna backslide.

That's why, it meant so much to me.

Haha, got a new haircut. :)) SHORT HAIR. Heehee. Jedy says I look really different. But, I love my fringe. ;))

Have been watching the Olympics. And I keep crying when I see people win medals! Oh my oh my. =/ Cuz... It's so... I don't know.

When I see the athletes, I think of what it means to them. Almost all athletes work all their lives to get to the highest level of 'prestige' in the sport. For many, it's the Olympics.

Many people think that it's embarrassing that athletes lose, that they don't get Gold, that they don't get first. But, thinking about it, there are so many athletes who are fighting to get a chance to join the national team to represent not only their countries, but also themselves, for the Olympics. WHY?

It's their dream. It's their life. Some might say it's their iron rice bowl. But I choose to believe that it's their dream. And they find it worth fighting for. They've shed blood and sweat and fought all their lives, breaking their limits, one after another. Just for this opportunity of a lifetime. Why would they do it, why would they want it?

Too many 'impossibles' achieved, too many records broken. Their chance to leave their name in history. The satisfaction derived from even being there is enough for them. 台上一分钟，台下十年工。

Just for those few minutes of glory. The stage is theirs. And the Olympics is their stage.

The Olympics is their ceiling. They are striving for breakthrough, to break their glass ceiling.

The Olympics is their dream, their goal.

What's yours?

Haha finally managed to see Kenneth's blog. There's seriously a huge problem with what technology can offer. With the improved technology, Daddy has Windows Parental Control to block stuff and I can't see me friends' blogs all the time. Annoying, aye?

Lol interesting. www.deathclock.com. Mine's Friday, June 7, 2069 if I'm normal, and Monday, August 21, 2090 if Im optimistic. WOW, I'll only live pass my 79th birthday if I'm normal. WAH but I can live until Dylan's 100th birthday if I'm optimistic. LOL.

So stressed. BLEAH. Prelims and A levels. WAH, the weight of it all.

Realised there's something wrong with my sleeping patterns. I sleep A LOT, at night, and in the day. I'm fine as long as I'm doing anything else but study. When I start studying, I fall asleep. I DO NOT KNOW WHY. So I started reading a little bit on sleep from Wikipedia. What seems most probable is something called "Excessive Daylight Sleeping". =S

Yes, those who know, yes, there is a problem with me. SIGH what is going on? Mampus la. =.=

RARRDIRARRDIRARRDIRARRDIRARR. I'm going mad. YES I'M GOING MAD.

But at least, here, I wanna encourage everyone. JIAYOU! Be it in work or in studies, JIAYOU. :)

HAPPY belated NATIONAL DAY! :)

Today's word was good. 7 qualities of servanthood, which I feel aptly describes discipleship too.

SUPER GROUNDED. :(

I will be strong. :)

好不习惯这样的自己，沉默寡言，
不要，也很不喜欢，这样的变化。
好象失去了什么，遗失了什么的，
只想着如何逃跑，如何逃避一切。
不敢告诉任何人，也没那个勇气。

Huiqi's not about Taiwanese and Korean dramas only, okay?

They are a good way to spend some quality relaxation time, but I don't spend days with them.

I think I can spend days with these few things:
Friends
Family
A karaoke machine
BOOKS!!!

Yeah. I like history; whereby history refers to pre-modernized China, England, Egypt and Italy. Oh, in recent years, Europe and N American history have also been added to the list.

I love music. Performing. Singing. I love my instrument. I love Chinese Orchestra. I love classical music. I love love songs. I love modern music. I love all sorts of music.

I love art. All kinds. Abstract. Canvas. Graffiti. Performing arts. Still art. Sculpture. MUSIC. Theatre productions. Musicals. Plays. Concerts. Performances. Design. Architecture. Fashion design. Hands on.

I love cooking. Baking. Working in the kitchen with food. =))

I love sports. Tennis. Badminton. Fencing. Running. Cycling. Netball. Frisbee. Floorball. Swimming. Softball. Bowling. ETCETERA ETCERTERA.

I love going crazy. I love laughing. I love studying. I love my family and friends.

See? Huiqi is definitely MORE THAN korean and taiwan DRAMAS okay.

Tata.