December 12, 2006

冬令時差

她的深夜一點半,我的清晨九點半。
在msn上稀有地巧遇。

我告訴她最近發生的事情。
她也告訴我她最近的事。
她不需要說她好不好,我就知道她很好。

她是個很有主見的女人,大落落的。
她的他是個義大利籍的'photographer-to-be'

她語帶興奮卻又有點害羞地給我一個放滿攝影作品的網站,
我無法不讚嘆她真的很美,不是只有在鏡頭底下,
也不是因為她全身赤裸,毫無遮掩地展示自己。

我看著這個和我相識十幾年的女人,
豐腴的軀體,在黑白膠捲與陰鬱陽光的交錯之下,
有一種令我望塵莫及的什麼。

I asked,"Is he your bf?"
"Um...we just have fun together." she said.

"So, how long have you been spending time together?"
"Surprisingly, one year."

"Happy?"
"We had much great time.
Out of my expectation.
I thought it would just had been a short-term relationship
but 6 months passed and then one year passed.
We are still having a good time."

"Just have fun means?"
"No pressure."

"Simply."
"Indeed."

"I wish I could do the same thing as you do."
"You know I'm just too relaxed.
There're too many things in my mind. I don't need a boyfriend now."

"Yeah, maybe, some day. I wish I could. It seems really relaxing and happy.
But I don't know if I can handle this, including myself. You know me."
"Oh, come on! Just have fun you little sweetie! Enjoy your life!"

"You are so beautiful in the photos. Really."
"Thanks."

"I'll be fine. I'll find my way having fun
and enjoying my life with someone, or myself."
"You certainly will."

"Time to go to bed you. 3am already."
"Yeah. And don't let my family and anyone else see that website!"

"Pay me!"
"Eat shit!"

她哥哥常說,我們兩個應該要揉起來捏一捏再分開。
她也這麼覺得,我也是。
我們一個太放鬆,一個太緊張。

不過,我會找到我的,她會找到她的,
我們會有各自的時區。


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