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October 19, 2009

我是俗喇!I'm Looser!

这是一篇充满抱怨与负面意识的文章,读了心情很有可能会不好,所以想要继续心情好或者心情已经不是很好的朋友,劝请你们还是不要读的好。This article consists of negative emotion, please do not read if you don't wish to listen to naggings.

是哪一个狗屁哲学家说的什么你想要的东西往往得不到""You don't always get what you want"?!
瓦靠!我就被这句话这样诅咒了!当你很想要一样东西,却得不到的时候,你便会经历与面临死亡同样的五个过程:
-, 恼怒
二, 反驳
三, 讨价
四, 忧郁
五, 接受

也许程度轻了很多,却也消耗了我一堆泪水。
我讨厌,我讨厌那些天真烂漫又无知的人。
看起来纯良无邪,却无知的听不见,看不到,也感受不到外界。
因为天真烂漫,神经大条,完全都不敏感,所以他们对看得见的事情以外的事不闻不问是天经地义的,都要别人来照顾;可是,你却永远无法憎恨他们。
因为他们是正道,只是天真,只是粗心;所以忘了体会和体恤周遭的人;相比之下,看得到一些细微事务的人像是天生的仆人,注定要去收拾残局。
如果他们不去收拾残局,放着不管,又或者收拾之后有什么不舒爽,便是和天真无知的烂漫族群对抗的恶势力
我一直以为自己是公主,很多朋友都觉得我有公主病;但在我走出父母的羽翼,和好朋友的势力以外后,我才知道:我其实是天生的卑女命!
我以前会是公主是因为爸爸妈妈让我,亲朋好友们让我;没有他们,我真的只是一个凡人。
可惜的是,我又不天真,又不无知,和那群可爱的朋友一起,一开始就注定输下去,不可能赢。
最最可恶的是,我在讨厌这样的人的时候,连一句稍微诅咒别人的话都说不出来!
而我妈却哈哈笑说:这是当然的,因为你是我生的;天生就不会咒人。
%¥#·¥%……—#@%*&$
还我有自己生气自己起来。

总而言之,我是俗喇,这些只是一个俗喇在消怨气的话。

Don't know which philosopher has ever said, "You don't always get what you want." Which is clearly applied on and cursing me.
It's kind of like....... Wakao! type of feeling.

When you have something you wish for desperately while you could not get it; you’ll undergo 5 stages as you encounter bad news and death. They are:

1. Anger

2. Denial

3. Bargain

4. Depression

5. Acceptance

Of course the level or severity of these feelings are much lesser compared to encountering major life events, it still costs my tears.


There one spicies among the people who are purely naive, innocent and ignorant.
As they are so innocent and ignorant, we cannot blame them from not looking around, not listening to the surrounding and not understanding other people.
They are the 'good' side people, purely naive and insensitive, so they accidentally by pass the people's feeling. And, you can never hate them.
On the other hand, those who are sensitive, aware and considerate are destined to solved things that they overlook, just like an inferior or a maid.
If these people ever complained about the extra works in taking care of the precious species, they are of no good.
I thought I was a pearl, friends treated me as if I'm a princess. Only after I'm left alone with myself then I know, actually I'm a nobody of natural born maid's character.
I was a princess because my parents treat me as one, because my friends let me be one.
And living among the innocent creatures, I'm forever the maid who never wins in a conflict. You'll feel bad and guilty of yourself if you held louder voice to them.
The worst part is... I can't hate them..... and is now angry with myself &*^%#@$*(&

Whatever, these are bragging words from a looser...


P/S: My time frozing machine....... seems to be more and more far from me.........


September 29, 2009

手术台上的眼泪 Tears at The Operation Theatre

今天早上,我被迫起了个一大早,要到离家里四十分钟车程的医院的手术室去学习麻醉过程。
而观摩对象(要被动手术的人)是一个看起来不过刚上小学的小男生。
这个小孩很乖,一不哭,二不闹,丝毫不做挣扎,让医护人员抱到手术台上;和其他大吼大叫,哭天抢地的对护士`医生们动用武力的小孩比起来,他的安静令人忍不住多往他瞄几眼。
就在我好奇他可以忍到什么时候,而他终于躺在手术台上,看着手术台冷冰冰的天花’铁‘时,这个小孩终于眼睛开始泛红,沉默的流下两颗眼泪;而在他身旁的母亲也在下一秒钟,眼泪若断了线的珍珠般,止不住的流,母亲的双手也管不住脸上的泪水,仅仅顾着轻柔的为小男孩拭去眼角的泪滴。
我看了眼前这一幕,心里好不心酸,生病的小孩叫人心疼;生病又懂事的小孩更更叫人心疼;旁人已有感如此,更何况是骨肉至亲?真是惨绝人寰。
于是乎,我便关心了起来,转头问持有病历的朋友:“这个小男孩得了什么病?要动什么手术?“

“噢,他啊?盲肠炎啊?当然是割盲肠喽!“他笑说。

我当下愣了一下。
随即他又笑说:“他们哭得太惨烈了厚?“
我听了也是一笑。

之后,他们又哭了一阵子,小男孩终于进入麻醉,妈妈功成身退。

回想他们一颗一颗的眼泪滑落脸庞,而我却在心里轻笑他们,我惊觉自己的不知所谓!什么时候开始,我变得目中无人地看不见病人的痛楚?
对于一个七八岁的小孩,手术台简直就是洪水猛兽,他们哪里管得了你是要在他们身上割盲肠还是割肿瘤。谁对未知的东西不害怕?

而那位母亲并不清楚儿子只是割盲肠吗?当然不会。可是我当时却忘了,一个母亲对孩子的心疼,哪怕是再小的手术,再小的病痛,妈妈是舍不得孩子受一点苦`一点难的;孩子都不安得哭了,妈妈哪里还会忍得了?
所以那些小孩又哭又闹又何妨?病人家属多番刁难又何妨?他们的担心与不安都来自身上的血`的肉。
不过还是希望遇见合作的病人,或者是可以合作的病人,这样才会有双赢的局面啦!


This is a random picture of a surgery, not related to the topic.


September 21, 2009

看不见,听不到 —— The Uncertainties

我听不见风的叹息,却看见了树叶摇摆不定,所以,外面的风在吹着吧?
我看不见流动的空气,却依旧在呼吸着;所以,氧气都在我得周围吧?
人啊,是一种极度缺乏安全感的动物——就我来说——又或许就我这个人种来说吧。
往往在看不见,听不见时,质疑真理的存在。
就像我,现在,不在战争之中,不受饥寒交错,没有四肢残缺,也无病无痛;就幸福的意思来说,我已经身在其中了吧?
但还是总是向老天爷追问自己的幸福,我是否贪得无厌?
也许,是因为我是个空荡荡的人,装不住所谓幸福;
也许,是因为坏事总在感受到幸福的时候突然插队进来,让我战战兢兢,不敢承认自己在幸福中。
我想要幸福;
但是,更想要所有我周围的人和不在我周围的人远离不幸。

老天爷,希望大家都和平安康,幸福快乐。



P/S: 这次的考试太诡异了——是有史以来,我最不知道怎么形容的考试。。。。。。该怎么说呢?搞笑得不象一回事。


September 9, 2009

黄腾浩 《合同杀人》 绝对值的期待的作品!Tender's New Movie, which worth to watch!

電影:[合同殺人]
絕色影城.交替影展
9/24(四)15:30
9/26(六)18:30


忍不住帮一个演员宣传他的作品。
为什么?
因为他是货真价实的实力派!有看过张栋梁的
MV,《寂寞边界》`电影《安娜与安娜》`戏剧《光阴的故事》`偶像剧《紫玫瑰》等等,你就会发现他的实力。
一开始是因为‘白咖啡‘ 才注意到他,无意中看到他的图片,才知道:咦,这不是张栋梁的MV和SHE的MV里头演技派MV男主吗?
老早就注意到有这样的一个人,却始终找不到他的名字。这下阴错阳差,才突然又看见了他,才知道他有了那么多作品与发挥的机会!知道他叫黄滕浩!(应文名叫tender;本名黄腾德————为什么要改啊?腾德也很好啊,与‘疼得‘谐音哩——哎呀,不好意思,离题了。。。:p)
可惜啊!这次的短电影 《合同杀人》只有在台湾播映,否则,绝对是戴秋桦本年度必看电影之一!
故事叙述的是一个边缘故事,阴沉又消极的人物,说它极端,又不尽然;因为这是在现实生活中不鲜见的黑色故事。
因为黄腾浩一贯浑然天成的自然派演技,让我非常好奇也期待他演绎黑色人物的方式——
所以,有机会去看这部作品的朋友们,记得支持哦!我想看也没有机会的说。

I've spotted a nice actor recently, maybe I'm just too insensitive, he has become very popular since end of last year. He is Tender Huang Teng-hao.
His latest movie <合同杀人>, the direct translation will be "Murder Along" (there is no english title, so I just translate it in this way). It's a story lingers around border-lined personality. Very bizzare and blue to grey story. It's going to be on show at 24th September 09 15.30 and 26th Sept 09 18.30 in Taiwan. I strongly recommend this because of his very natural skills in acting, which worth a look.
Therefore, for those who is able to have a chance, don't miss this!


P/S: It's late... still need to go to clinic tomorow morning, signing off... and exam is next week... help! I still have a lot of assignment await to be completed... dying....


September 6, 2009

Happy Birthday, Tai Mummy!!! 妈妈生日大快乐!

妈妈,生日快乐!
虽然我不能在你身边,还是希望你生日大快乐!
非常幸运做你的女儿哦!哇哈哈,从今以后也请多多指教,继续把我宠上天吧!
身体健康,万事顺利,修行愉快——呃,要不要祝你早日修成正果啊?可是,我舍不得你耶。
下次吧!
祝妈妈超级无敌的幸福!!!


Ps: 为了庆祝那么有意义的日子,远赴他乡的我是不是也应该买个蛋糕来吃一吃庆祝啊?嘻——好,决定了!我们就隔空庆祝吧!


September 5, 2009

亲亲老妈的生日,倒数开始!Mummy's birthday,let's count down from now!

明天就是我亲亲妈妈的生日啦!在这个普天同庆的日子——(旁边有声音说道:为什么你妈的生日要普天同庆啊?)
呃——随便啦,我妈的出生决定了我的出生,我的出生不值得大家感到高兴吗?(大家棋喊:“不值得!“)瓦列,大家的默契怎的突然变这样好?
言归正传啦!妈妈的生日对我来说是世上最美好的日子,决定了我幸福的开始!
各位为我的幸福而感到高兴的人都一起来举杯同庆吧!
这一天,首先要感谢妈妈的出世,再来要感谢妈妈的妈妈让妈妈出世,当然也要感谢功不可没的外公啦!
还要感谢所有帮助过妈妈,还有磨炼过妈妈的人,没有他们,妈妈也没有今天,成为那样坚强,独立自主,美丽又善良的女人!
也要谢谢婆婆啦,她这个家婆可是把我妈的厨艺磨得闪闪发光的呢!让我自懂事时就天天吃香喝辣,嘻——
爸爸要多多照顾妈妈,保护妈妈,爱护妈妈哟!
妈妈!生日大快乐!祝你身体健康,青春永驻,永远美丽,幸福快乐!
我写的情书你应该看到了哦!老妈,我爱你!最近看到了一些小故事,小小的领悟到,爱要说出口;因为我们东方人都太‘ging'了,到最后想说的都来不及说。所以,我就大大方方的写情书给妈妈了,信封上的收件人只有妈妈两个字,因为在我们家这是一个为你而设,独有的称谓!

美丽无比的妈妈!


生日要快乐,生日之后也快了!希望我们三个老是让你头痛的家伙也会是你的幸福!XOXO


August 29, 2009

羡慕得不到,想要不可能,难怪,难怪,那么多感慨.

最近老是在浪费时间中,心中越是着急,行动越是怠惰;有时恨不得想要掐死自己。
可惜我是个热爱生命的,掐死自己当然是说说而已。
看一看周围的人,都是有目标有理想的,都忘各自的方向前进,我始终在原地踏步,始终在自说自话,不禁讨厌自己起来了。
我好羡慕那些努力的人,有努力的目标,有努力的动力。
反之,我好像看不见自己的前面一样的莽撞。
如果,我擅自决定一个想要的目标去努力,那我是不是就会拥有一个努力的目标,就会拥有动力?
不知道为什么,从什么时候开始就没有特别想要的东西。
好像还有一点点害怕想要的心情------
可能是因为经常失望,经常得不到吧!
花布罗嗦,现在就想个目标来努力看看------

以下是我在穷乡僻壤的医院拍到的中古型医疗器材!
这个手术室的灯是没有开关的哟!直接插上插头就行了!而且它不是摆美的,还在被用着。




噔噔噔噔!他就是autoclave,嘻,注意他的门把,超怀旧的!


正面,啊,忘了补充,这个也是functional地!


婴儿复苏床,经典吧!这个也是还可以用的哦!三面塑胶墙是可拆开的。


好了,夜已深,拜拜。祝各位,事事顺心,快乐。 (^_^)


August 12, 2009

Microwave secret recipe...

When there are only a microwave and a ricecooker..... people tend to find some way to survive and here was my microwave recipe during the last kudat posting......




Look not bad leh... I oso made mashed potatoes, soup and others... but forgot to take picture le...
anyway, the main course were always instant noodles....so... anti mee-maggie for the time being >.


July 26, 2009

最近新作!!

我亲爱的朋友们,本人最近有新作,就刊登在:

http://www.sj131.com/modules/article/articleinfo.php?id=1657

啦!没错!小女子正式踏入网路小说界了!尽情各位侠女英雄多多指教喽!嘻---
考试在即!神啊!请赐我神力!
大家也祝福祝福我吧!


July 10, 2009

Malacca Trip in May, The Food CHapter!

I'm sure u all know, there are few things in the world do not require a word to communicate:
there are arts, music and FOOD!!
So, I wont spend much in words, come and share the food....'s images; hehe :p












( Got people shout:Wei... why all the pictures show the left over de?) Aiyah, seemed u have noticed, haha, cz the food was too nice and delicious, everybody
cant wait to dig in before I can have a picture capture...(actually I;m one of the food-fighter oso la... believe me, u'll forget to snap watever picture once u see
the food, wat u 'automatically' do is to EAT!


June 26, 2009

走进时光隧道—— Travel Through The Time Machine.....

Travel throught the time machine? Hehe, I guess u guys know wat I mean; yes, in deed, it is
somewhere historical......Malacca; and it's where I've been laid my feet for 2 years, where I'm familiar, yet, unfamiliar.
Now, let's see my memory pieces of the travel of May... Soli for late.

上一段假期去了马六甲,仿佛走入了时光隧道一般,不愧为古城,每个角落仿佛都栖息了古早时期的零碎记忆,每个屋檐下仿佛都还留下了古人的身影——
所以就一起看看我从哪里风尘仆仆的回来吧!嘻——
——————
.... erm....... soli, the connection tooo slow edi... so, very soli, really sorry, next time la.... :p... ok... now trying to upload (^^) Start from where leh... hehe, always the food first, this is the door of a famous 'Nyonya' food restaurant. Let's dig in! wow, hehe, saliva comes out edi? This is called Pai-Tee Nyonya laksa of Little Kocik Nyonya Otah-otah Oklah, now come to the real frames of the historical malacca...A traditional 'nyonya's house, it's now an antique shop Green stone chairs!! Soooooo significant! The gate to backyard... do I look like transfered to the past?
This is what is called 'tian chuang' the sky windows, which we seldom see in modern buildings Long long track to ancient living room... Looking down from the stairs. More to be shared in Travel Through the time machine #2!!! Hehe... bye bye!


June 20, 2009

Oh My God, facebook is blocked here!!!

Sob, sob sob.... friends, I'm now far away from the city in somewhere across the cloud....
oso across the rainbow....
Here starts my tragic story,
the district posting, when I open up the logbook, I'm like oh my god!!! Who can complete
these tasks? Soooo many.... there are more 200 columbs...... meanings 200 jobs.
Then, I tried to convinced myself never mind la, one day 10 tasks, 'Maybe' can finish....
then, my supervisors anounce again, u have to hand in 30 case-clerking and 1 complete case study....
Walao, thunder storm!!! Bang bang bang!!!... Ok lo, never mind I try to comfort myself again, everyday
do 10 tasks plus 1 case clerking, maybe I can finish the task....
Then, the other supervisor come and said, in this hospital there is a species of undocumented plasmodium,
each people go follow through 5 cases and copy allllllll the case notes clinical features and progression....
Wakao.... do I still have time for my own? There are bedside teaching to attend, case presentation, and small group discussion
somemore, do u think I will still have mood and energy to study???
Then... never mind, I tell myself, since we have so much stress, I need to go find some leisure to release it...
And finally, I got access to this super slow connection.....
You know wat's the problem again?? They blocked facebook!!!
*%#$@*&#
Wat shud I say??? ......#@$%*&@

PS: I have another proect report and loan renewal to do... how...? Sob...


June 11, 2009

Easy Love, Easy Come, Easy Go.

When love is so easy? How much easy? As easy as saying hello.
Sigh.
I love you, such an easy phrase, even the kinder garden kids know how to spell them.
But do these people understand what does it mean?
A guy said he loves you so much and he will give you his commitment to death...
Will you believe it? When he can't even recall your birthday and your last name.
I would like to say, please dont give anymore jokes if I were the case.
Another case of saying I miss you everytime meeting, and missing after saying too much missing...
Hahaha, I found it really interesting and absurd.
Then another saying love to a stranger......
Love becomes a joke as I grew older and I'm just not naive enough to fall into those tricks.

(However, please do not test me)
Another case, occur on my younger sister, there has been a guy chasing her for sometime...
and it happenned that my sister was sleeping sweet and sound(she is super hard to be waken up, hmm... a meteor may be just enough to accomplish the task)....
Ok, story from beginning again, my younger sister was sleeping sweet and sound.... and her hand phone rang and rang
and rang and rang and rang and rang and rang and rang and rang again and again...(Ok, I am exagerating, it was rang for 3 times only)but the ring tone
was super irritating and my elder sister was irritated. With her fierceful eyes she stared at the noisy hand phone; the hand phone got
her ultimate scary...terrifying eyes and she had successfully frightened the hand phone to silence.
However, just after few seconds, this brave hand phone regained its courage hp and rang again......
(=_=#) So, my elder sis looking peacefully (the uncovered storms was within) catched the phone and answered it
:" Hello..."

There came a voice from a guy:"Hello~ ,dear~~~ what are you doing~?" with a ultra(>super)disgusting tone.

My sister forehead wrinkled (probably bcz she is utmost disgusted to guys with 'ane ane' tone) and there she answered
:" What are you doing then?"

The guy answered:" Now ar? I'm thinking of you~~~"

My sister looked even irritated,(0>o)# and you can see shadow on her forehead, (O~O) but with her forever peaceful tone, she answered:
" Okay, then you continue to think la." and COPE! Hanged out the phone and put the phone back to the staircase.

Few minutes later, the phone rang again, and my mother passed by, curiously looking at the 'keep-ringing' hand phone.
(As my mother is super cute and super curious)She cant help herself to pick up the phone and said:"Hello..."

There the guy answered worriedly: " Hello, dear, why did you just hang up my call?"

Then, my mother was blurred and asked:" May I know who are you? Mr.?"

Then, the ultra bodoh and low IQ guy answered: " Dear, don't play liao la, don't trick me edi... enough play play."

Then, my mother felt even blurred plus some irritated and COPE! The phone was hanged up again, since my mama feels not intersted edi.

Then, the phone rang and rang and rang and rang until my younger sister finally regain her consciousness and woke up...
and of course she answered the phone.
"Sorry, dear, sorry dear, did I just made you angry? Please, please don't be angry with me!! Please give me one more chance!"

Ok, end of the story, did you guys get the theme of this story --- that until the last moment, the guy
don't even realize that he could not recognize which is and which one is not my younger sister's voice....


June 7, 2009

当死亡变得令人羡慕。。。

这绝对不是一片消极的文章,我也绝对没有想死的意志,只是因为一个故事,一篇小说而有所感触。
小说的男主角说:“只要世界上有一个人相信我没疯,我就不会疯。”
女主角说:“我永远相信,请你别疯。”
然而女主后来却为了男主的自由,坚决毅然的死去,死得不留余地。
世界上唯一的那一人死了,所以男主疯了。
我把故事说的太精简,也许大家会对男主与女主的反应与行为起争议和疑虑。
而后,男主疯了,后来逢得与女主一起看过同样的烟火,随着飘零的烟花和灰烬,从高塔上,飘落成一片白色的翅膀。
说了那么多,总而言之,男主也死了吧?
没错,他也死了。典型的大家都死了的结局。
恢复原题,这样的死亡值得人羡慕吗?也许你不,但我羡慕。
尤其羡慕的是他们拥有的最后一刻,楼外楼下满是追杀他们的人,他们却恍若无人,两人在阳台上看烟火,彼此的眼中只有彼此。
他们的故事过于坎坷,所以凄美,所以刻骨民心,所以可以决定疯不疯,所以可以‘视死如归’。
不要以为我喜欢这种要人命的浪漫,我非常明白他们是被形势所逼,不死永远比死去好上千倍。
我贪妄的是那颗真心。。。。。。一颗在二十一世纪濒临绝种的真心和死了都要爱的决绝。
然而,理智如我,自私如我,我大概是死不下去的。
所以,我羡慕。


May 31, 2009

Happy Birthday To Me

Today is my birthday, I have more than a lot greetings....
Presents are few but I'm not focusing much on those...
Mummy prepared me fried chicken and french fries...
Frens asked me out yesterday for gatherin and bill on them...
then, wat is lack during my birthday?
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Then only I know --- It's a birthday song!!!
and of course sth else... I'm not complete... and where is the part to complete me?? I shall see.