December 15, 2009

wonderer....

Home? yes, I have a warm and nice home, have caring parents and brothers to accompany me. But, I was never really with them since I was 15.

At 15, I went abroad to US alone for studying music, since then, I was ''homeless wanderer'' inside my heart. I had memorable times there, it was so beautiful that you never want to let it go, but at the end, it would always leave you alone.... my memories and friends were merely like a dream, its short, disappointing, and you wake up with nothing...

All the sadness and sorrow will simply fade out while time flies. Yes, I was happy to restart my journey... I took my courage to seek for my own home again, so my fate brought me to Singapore.

Singapore was great, very different from US, its crazily hot.... and humid... I met new friends, new school, new environments.... everything was new and fresh, it totally kills my sadness of leaving US. Great, Fun Exciting were the only simple words that I can describe my life here.

Who knows, in 2009 December, my parents and I have decided that Singapore is not the final place for me, that means I need to be like a nomad, wander to another unexpected place... Need to leave my beloved friends, everything will again become memories..

Why, Why I do not have stable friends who I can at least be with over 5 years... like other people at my age. When ever someone talks about how long they have been knowing each other for over 10 years, I can never imagine that kind of feeling... How wonderful that would be?! So, is it the fate for being as a musician? Like Beethoven, Schubert? always so lonely in their entire lifetime??!!

Where is my home?

where do I actually belong to??

 and where is the one for me???


.............sad

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